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Some New Number 2

2008-12-05T23:02:00.001-08:00

In a weeks time I've earned my turn as Number two! The identity of number 1 has eluded me thus far, but, as he only communicates via an eye portal in the wall and calls on the Alexander Graham Bell device, a cake of soap for the eye and a few wire snips soon sorted that out. I rule with gentle hand (tucked into a fist of iron, of course.) Having edicted the anassing of mouse-heads, and broken more prisoners than really required, I find myself somewhat at ease, ruling in the Genius doctor's name! Bwuhahaha!!

There is some dissent though, amongst the Village People. One in particular, a catty one (not in a good sense) acts as if she owns the place. Her impertinence annoys me.

I've settled into a cozy relationship with one of the rover devices- they're remarkably sensitive and enjoyably brutal! We go for long rolls on the beach, evenings spent not-too-close to the fire, and skulking after escapees! very nice!

Another sip of brandy before a delightful smother...what's this? Rather too earthy..the room spins! That catty woman! Drugged!....

Darkness washes over me again....

Cough! Cough!

Curses. Still in this pit!

For weeks now...entombed alive. Living off of earthworms and ground water...an occasional rodent (Five, me mousie friend escaped safely, I hope; he scampered off many days ago, after he saw me scarf that marmoset.) I drift in and out of hallucination, nightmares dance before my eyes-

(Cato's Hallucination, as performed by The Cure-)

Lime green lime green lime green and tangerine

Are the sickly sweet colours of the snakes I'm seeing

Lime green lime green and tangerine

Are the sickly sweet colours of the devil in my dreams

It gets to Friday and I give you a call

"You know I'm getting kind of worried

No she doesn't seem herself at all...

Lime green and a sickly kind of orange

I've never seen her like this before..."

I had the best laid plans this side of America!

Started out in church and finished with Angelica

Red and blue soul with a snow white smile

"Can you dig it?"

I had the best laid plans this side of America

Started up in church and finished with Angelica

And now I dig it in the dirt

And I'm down here for a while...

Down here for a while...

You've got to make up your mind and make it soon

Is there room in your life

For one more trip to the moon?

Is there room in your life...For one more?

Burn red burn red burn red burn red and gold

Are the deep dark colours of the snakes I hold

Burn red burn red burn red and gold

Are the deep dark colours of the devil at home

She pulls me down just as I'm trying to hide

Grabs me by the hair and drags me outside

And starts digging in the dirt...

For a not so early bird it's the only way

For her to get the worm

I had the best laid plans this side of America

Started out in church and finished with Angelica

Red and blue soul with a snow white smile

"Can you dig it?"

I had the best laid plans this side of America

Started out in church and finished with Angelica

And now I dig it in the dirt

And I'll be down here for a while...

"Hello? are you still there?"

...And much too late..."

... Sorry... wrong number..."

Hrmmm? What's That?! A light???

A Rival

2008-11-25T01:22:00.001-08:00

Having woken and explored, I find myself within a sea-side resort prison compound! What a waste of tax dollars! I've taken my usual Tiny-kitty form and have been summoned to meet some sort of evil overlord. -Off I go to the green domed building, where I'm whisked in to an evil underground lair!

Stay tuned!

The Imprisoned

2008-11-12T23:19:00.001-08:00

I remember the rocks falling, the press of soil. The mousey scree as Five, my pet, scurried away. The silence. Who knows how long. Scraping, searching. No strength, finally submitting to the void. All darkness.

Deep, long sleep- I find comfort. Darkness and stillness will be my company.

Then I rouse, finally. To my surprise a warm bed, bandages! A rescue! I open weary eyes and see a hospital. Fine, I will recover, all is well.

To delicious, healing slumber I return; the darkness comes again, this time bringing restoration to my weary bones. I greet it with renewed welcome.

I awaken again, health seemingly returned. A new bed- new room. Where is this?

I rise finding clothing at the foot of this foreign bed, I don it. Some sort of frock coat and official badge. I notice my shape is neko, though I entered the tunnels in my smaller form. I assume this aided my healing somewhat. This place is strange to me- it seems too clean for New Toulouse, too modern for Steelhead or Caledon. Odd.

I wander the rooms of this house, for a residence it is, tho empty. No papers or signage reveal wear I am. Surely, I'm grateful to be whole, but my curiosity now runs rampant.

A step outside reveals unusual flora, palms and temperate together! Is this mainland? The place is empty, no chat noise, no sploders overhead. An Island, I take it, the Colonies perhaps? I wander the verandas, plazas and gardens, drawing near a main building..

A large chess set outside a town hall- voices now in the distance-

A quaint village indeed.

But where am I, who has brought me here? What might this badge signify?

Stay tuned...

Talking Animals? Typical meme.

2008-10-11T02:02:00.001-07:00

Your result for The Literary Style Test...

George Orwell

Your Literary Style Is 33% Realistic, 33% Philosophical, and 33% Psychological!

Your literary style mostly resembles George Orwell's. Orwell mainly wrote allegorical or symbolic stories, often with a blatant political message. His writing was highly fantastic and involved strange settings and odd scenarios, such as futuristic negative utopias or talking animals. His writing is mostly characterized by its allegorical nature, and its rejection of traditional realism. Similarly your own writing is often abstract, strange, and allegorical. You don't focus much on psychological issues, but tend to be more subtle, letting the symbolism or the strange story speak for itself. Your style is very straight-forward, not letting itself get bogged down in philosophical issues or thoughts, but instead focusing on crafting an interesting, intriguing story.

Some stories you may enjoy: 1984 and Animal Farm.

The other literary styles:

Edgar Allan Poe / Jorge Luis Borges / Franz Kafka / F. Scott Fitzgerald / Fyodor Dostoevsky / Herman Melville / Albert Camus

Take The Literary Style Test at HelloQuizzy

Beneath Mt. Steelhead-

2008-09-29T00:05:00.001-07:00

Beneath Mt. Steelhead-

Having narrowly escaped a mob of pitchfork-wielding Steelhead whale-defenders, I've decided to take a more direct approach to commerce in that port-town, a withdrawal of sorts. The managers had carelessly revealed in our meeting the coordinates to the Silver-hoard they had taxed the populace under the pretense of defense. (The silver was collected to "prevent the creation of ammunition that might harm the lycan Sheriff", so I had hopes there might also be other city officials susceptible to damage by arrows of Gold, impalement by Rubies, or nasty paper cuts by negotiable bearer bonds, and these had been collected too.) Having the coordinates in-hand, I wended my way through the tunnels of Steelhead, finding a spot directly (or as close as I could determine ) under the treasury.

Having found the location, I've secured a barrel charge of gunpowder, strung the fuse, and prepared a match...

Booooom!!

Hmmm, no hole...but a still a rumble!!

Oh dear. ...it's collapsing!

Rummmmble....Ruuummmmble.....

Ruuummmmble...Craaash...Ruuummmmble....

Ruuummmmble....

Is this the end of Cato Quan?

The Whaler, Part 2

2008-09-24T01:16:00.000-07:00

The journey to the viking lands in search of Viking crew having proved mostly fruitless (I did find some recipes on how to make bland food even blander, a few nice axes, and some unattended sheep to accompany me back to New Taloo, where I shall likely set up a mail-order bride business catering to Caledonian bachelors) I nevertheless pushed on my studies of the art of cetacean angling- this time finding a willing but nervous bunch of sailing-folk on Amity Island.

They were kind enough, but as the prey began to eat away parts of the boat, I thanked them and bid a hasty retreat. A trip to the library and a quick reading of an abridged Melville yielded better results.

As for crew, I was lucky in in the willingness of Oddkitty Bedlamie to accompany me. Wary of nosy fishing inspectors, she agreed on a naval outfit that might help ease our way out of any such detainment or investigation! How distracting indeed!

As I had fishing rights to Steelhead, I reasoned I have rights also to the whales that principally dwelt there. Therefore, if I could catch one that was merely vacationing elsewhere, I reasoned this was still fair game. So rather than setting course to the now-empty waters of Steelhead, we instead charted for the waters of Winterfell, where fell beasts are known to roam. Very quickly we found whale-sign! "A behemoth off the port bow!" was the cry! We tacked closer-

A mighty chase was had, tacking and running in tandem with the beast, till it slowed- alongside we crept-

A boat was lowered, we climbed down and paddled closer!

All at once I jumped on the beast! A mighty harpoon in hand!

Bedlamie, fierce and graceful, joined the hunt! The beast was o'er matched!

A fine catch! Bedlamie pulled it on board, and we sailed our prize back to New Taloo (after a quick shopping expedition to Winterfell)

The filleting completed, the canning now begins in earnest!

To be marketed as "SALMON-ella" "A mystery fishy food-product from the makers of Krazy Kat Kibble. Now with more Opiates!"

Just look for the rust-colored label!

The Whaler

2008-09-22T21:53:00.000-07:00

Late September.

Having been Cured of any trace of vampirism (a cure I'd rather not divulge, tho it included catnip oil, turkey basters, and a few days of squirtiness) I was invited to witness the capitulation of Steelhead to the Evil Tiny Kitty Genius Dr. Malegatto. She cleverly phrased it in terms of a "Non-aggression" pact, but it was clear that it was simple cry for mercy, derived from the appropriate awe they felt for her ingenious designs and suitable fear of her wrath. The good doctor, being wise, allowed them to keep their administration and town intact. For now. On my own part, I was able to secure a tidy little sideline.

When gathering intelligence on this Pacific Northwest town (by viewing the postcard on it's search results) I noticed a frolicking whale prominently pictured in the local harbor! I realized, after failing in our conference to determine the hiding-place of the silver-hoard the Elf-man and Genius-Girl administrators had amassed, that there may be some value in the whaley population- not so base as servitude in running smuggling blockades with crates strapped to chests; no, that had been done to death- but in old fashioned whaling! ...and then canning it as "Salmon" and selling it to hungry Caledon and Babbage! Perhaps with a bit of laudanum seasoning to keep the cans moving..

Having secured the whaling rights, I equipped myself and prepared to scout the Steelhead waters!

Miss Mari, of New Taloo, resplendent in naval outfit, agreed to accompany me on our scouting expedition. This was good, as I needed someone to haul and gut any catch we ran across.

We found no whale sign in the great harbors, and plied then the rivers in a steam tug, but again to no avail!

Could this be false advertising?! No whale-sign to be found! not so much as a beluga! How disappointing.

The sea had been barren, my frustration mounted. As any good Captain might, I took it out a bit on my crew.

I regained my senses, as Mari bid a hasty goodbye, I realized I had not investigated the science of whaling quite as much as I might have. I needed an experienced crew, salty, burly and one that would not ask many questions when it came canning time...

But, where, I pondered?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day, I realized- Pirates! Fisher-Pirates!

Vikings!!

That day I travelled to a viking settlement to roust a crew, sturdy of frame, and indifferent of moral.

"Hmm...'Eat at Olav's'. Apparently the Linden ad-farm ban isn't working..."

Night fell. I met no-one, apparently all were out a-viking.

I anticipated their return at any time, silently I crept into the well to surprise them on their return...any moment now...

zzzzzz.....zzzzzzz....zzzzzzz.....

Steampunk Style Test results

2008-09-15T11:17:00.000-07:00

Your result for The Steampunk Style Test...

The Aristocrat

68% Elegant, 21% Technological, 57% Historical, 32% Adventurous and 26% Playful!

You are the Aristocrat, the embodiment of steampunk elegance and poise. For you, dressing steampunk is first and foremost about simply looking good, with accessories and details to follow. However, this does not mean that you ignore the demands of creating a “steampunk look.” Your outfits weave together a balance between technology and style, and between period accuracy and beautiful anachronism. While your fashion inspiration may come from anywhere across the Victorian social spectrum, you always find a way to make your outfit beautiful. You will probably be found in the clothes of the steam age elite simply because of the greater elegance available to them. Chances are you dress this way because you like it, and you would still dress in this manner even if steampunk was not a popular interest.

Try our other Steampunk test here.

Take The Steampunk Style Test at HelloQuizzy

Kitten of the Damned

2008-09-14T21:21:00.000-07:00

September.

Please forgive the length of this report, but much has happened this month-past. First, the Odkitties sponsored a gathering in New Toulouse Algiers, to draw more visitors and conduct an informal census of the active members of the community, and announce our benevolent (heh)intentions through civic improvement and celebration. This event was greatly aided by the assistance of Oddkitty level-2 Instigator Karima, shown plotting here-

The event featured a Blues performer and was very well attended by his various groupies and minions, and by those of New Toulouse who could make it. Later, we took advantage of the assembled crowd to test the strength of the Zombie army being harbored under the old church nearby; but more on that another time-

Once the festivities had completed, stock of the state of New Toulouse was taken. Although it was successful, one of it's hoped-for attendees, local magistrate Mama Cree, had not appeared. Nor had she been seen for weeks. Concern was raised of the state of uncollected vagrancy taxes, and piling-up bootleggers' kickbacks going unclaimed. Her absence was a mystery! Twice I checked my underground vaults to verify I had not nabbed her accidentally. Luckily, my record keeping is thorough, and her name was not found among the registry of crawdad food, nor in the rolls of Zombie army subscription. I smelled opportunity!

Now was the time to seize the reins of power! Not myself, no; I abhor the detailed work of administration- I meant to find someone pliant to the soothing suggestions of the hypno-device, who, experienced in the mundanities of civil service and engineering, would serve as puppet-king of New Toulouse!

Who could it be? The Guvnah of Caledon? He has shown himself immune to the device! and so skittery and hard to find at times...

Brief research provided another candidate!---

TotalLunar Eclipse, of the Steelhead sims. Builder, administrator, manager. Elf. ...elf? (Tensai, another manager, equally adept, had big warning letters posted over her name.) So! the elf it shall be! Muh-haaah-haaah!

My fist reconnoiter of Steelhead was brief, but gained valuable information. First, the Hypno-wheel was not as effective as hoped; and second, I would need a bigger bag than my surveillance intelligence had suggested.

A clever ruse was needed! Donning the guise of the popular American icon Santa Claus, I would invite him to the North Pole to join the other "Elves" working there! A splendid plan!

As a sweetener, I enlisted the aid of the voluptuous Oddkitty Bedlamie as elf-temptress, and we set to Steelhead in sleigh to fetch our waiting victim..

Alas, all did not go smoothly, as related here-

I blame the interference of the sausage-breathed Baron Wolfenbach for the plan's failure!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Part Two.

Despondent at my failure, and at the expectation of the the Evil Tiny Kitty Dr. Malegatto's displeasure, I comforted myself by a visit to the Sanctuary Club; where I am wont on occassion to dance into the late evenings, ruminating over failed endeavors, and sputtering oaths of dark revenge under my breath..

White on white translucent black capes
Back on the rack
Bela Lugosi's dead

The bats have left the bell tower

The victims have been bled

Red velvet lines the black box

Bela Lugosi's dead

Undead undead undead

The virginal brides file past his tomb
Strewn with time's dead flowers
Bereft in deathly bloom
Alone in a darkened room
The Count
Bela Lugosi's dead
Undead undead undead

As I danced my sultry eastern kitten-dance, I caught the attention of a scantily, but artfully-clad woman, and of her slavish minions, who cooed and purred, under the spell of my strong kitty-pheromones (I bathe in a vat of it each morn.) Their leader-mistress cordially invited me to her castle for kibble and catnip. Being welcome for the company, I accepted.

Her castle, for she was Queen of this realm, was vast, and interestingly appointed. Queen Txxxxs invited me to roam and explore as she attended to the business of her minions. I wandered, interested, and following my nose found at last the Kibble-hoard to sate my belly.

On a near cushion I curled up to find my rest...sleep and drowsiness coming quickly....

I recall soft footsteps.. the soothing voice, reassuring..

Closer it grew....

My hypno ray! Malfunctioning! A dull pain!

I awoke hungry again. My body weakened, I roamed in a fog, escaping the confines of the castle, slowly regaining my wits and health.

I felt all was right, but decided to avoid the castle until I could be fitted for a spiked collar.

The day past, I asleep, blaming a multitude of Gin Fizzes for my state. As evening approached, I received an invitation to tour the Manse of Oddkitty Kiralette, Duchess of Middlesea and Illlyria. Perhaps there would be room for an Oddkitty smuggler's den?

As her grace greeted me, she lifted me in a hug, and woe- her catnip-based perfume overcame me - I admit I nipped at her neck! Affection, I say! but there the pin-prick holes were, tiny blood droplets marking them- I licked the wound clean to help, but the damage was done- as she swooned I fled!

What regret I felt! Am I a thrall? I had not tasted the blood of the vampire-mistress, yet some affect had arisen!

Soon, a summons came from Dr Malegatto! I answered obediently, reporting to the Lab...

She was stern and cool in manner, pointing out my faults- I had brought attention to her organization through no scheme of her own. I begged for my life, the doctor merely bade me follow to the lowest labs...

I was under her control now, light faded, the room spun, her angry gaze fixed upon me...

And here I awoke...A cure in store. What is the Cure she speaks of? I hope it's the band... but I don't expect it is..

A Night In Cake

2008-08-21T22:46:00.000-07:00

Victoria City Caledon, Governor's Palace

02:35 SL time...

"Twelve hours I'm waiting! Doesn't he even live here?!!!"

July- Oddkitties Local 1

2008-07-28T21:31:00.000-07:00

July did not seem a promising month for ETK world domination, at first. The good (evil) doctor has been absent from the labs, and the Caledon hierarchy still refused to cede their lands and wills to her genius. My attempts to wrest Sim Management status from The Viceriene, the true power of Caledon, were met with an invitation to "go jump in a lake." So I did, but to no avail.

I wallowed late nights pondering, taking solace in the charms of New Taloo's fine drinking establishments, consorted by an array of belles, ruffians, and the occasional bored zombie. "Back Zombie! You will find no brains here!" Eventually after several late nights in amusing company, and several chilling nights spent underneath it's outdoor tables, I realized what I was missing most- Shelter!

A Cunning plan was hatched- a home for wastrels, minions, and those of like mind. A secret society, to provide shelter for The sim's rain-besogged drinkers- Perhaps, perhaps we could call it...Benevolent?!! Bwah-hah-hah! yessss. But not the Masons, no..There is already a Mason-guy in every sim...

And so was born The (Mostly) Benevolent Fellowship of Oddkitties! (Not a front for the Worldwide Evil Tiny Kitty Conspiracy, oh no sirree). The ranks filled quickly, and grows still. A meeting-hall has been constructed, which houses Speaking area, Labs, Submarine base, and devices diabolical.

From this lectern, speeches of swaying drunken ineloquence may spring forth, heeded or no!

Hoping to provide the freshest crayfish gumbo in New Taloo, I've preserved an easy access-way to their growing-pits. Perhaps someday I'll cover the opening...it's far too useful now, though.

The crayfish are served forth in a Free Soup Kitchen, maintained out front by the Oddkitties. Special "down-home" seasonings (like Laudanum) help convince passers-by to join our fellowship!

Our first "Irregular" meeting happened unannounced at the local hobo encampment, where, after searching through the vanished hobo's belongings, we joined in a Mambo Amoeba of Doom-

Followed by Mambo Mob Bull-riding, and line dancing through the streets of Costa Rica, frightening livestock and small children. Not terribly productive, but delightfully non-conformist in its own way. With babyquakes we shake the foundations of society! Soon, the nations will tremble before the unconventionality and awesome mystery of the Oddkitties, Bwah-hah-hah!!!

Go For the Guv

2008-06-27T00:30:00.000-07:00

The Genius Doctor has informed me that there is another application for Minion. I greet this news with some trepidation, as I fear the halving of my supply of Mouseheads. I determine to strike a blow for the Hidden Paw that will not go unnoticed. I resolve to begin my acquaintence with the leader of these free isles, too long in peaceful slumber- The Guvnah himself.

Luckily, I find him on the ingenious torture device he has had constructed- A Furries Wheel, I believe he calls it. Creatures are barred into seats and slowly spun to oblivion! Brilliant madness! It has yet to be submerged, but once it is in the water it shall serve to coerce his enemies to adopt Caledonian correction quickly!

I found him on it's trial run, I sat myself down on the seat, next to Miss Mari (of new Taloo) and chatted amiably.

Once his suspicion eased, I struck! Activating my Hypno-wheel and fixing him with my eyes, I bent his will to mine! Bwauh-hah-ha! I first asked for copy/mod rights...for all of Caledon!!!

He resisted, and mentioned Estate Manager rights...but then explained this was mainly Janitorial, returning lost or discarded objects...I considered, but it sounded like -work- to me...I hesitated a moment too long, and in a flash, his IM Storm Super-abilities rescued him. He was off to manage some tier payment issue! Poof he was gone!

Alas, I fear the Doctor will not be impressed. Next stop, the mousehead barrel, then the backyard, to cache it!

Look Who's Watching

2008-06-27T00:18:00.000-07:00

How often have you wished you could be in the den of some wily adversary as they spoke of their plans for -or to somehow prevent- world domination? Plenty, if you're in this line of work. For the Doctor's pleasure I created two such devices that allow just this opportunity! Portrait-boxes where you are the subject!

A fancy box, with a profile portrait-

Or a simple-life size depiction-

One has but to put one out in the study-room of one's foe, hop in, watch and listen as your adversary unwittingly chortles about and spills his or her most guarded plots and plans for your evil eavesdropping pleasure! Bwuah-hahh-hah-haha!!

Fashion Show Face-Off

2008-06-27T00:12:00.001-07:00

I had been asked by Miss Discovolante (after some prodding, I'll admit) to participate in a Fashion Show for Tinies. Ah-ha! I thought. The perfect place to test my new Widespread Hypnotising device! Certainly, if the attendees did not carry mice, they would actually -be- mice, or know where they would be found! A bonanza, Bwuah-hah-hah-haaa! I would feast well.
The party raged, well attended...now was the time to strike!

The hypnowheel was activated! I read my demands to the assembled crowd- but mice were not forthcoming; Instead, a call went out for funds to bribe a Super-hero-type to awaken and stop me! Curses!!!

And who appeared, but Wonder-gator-Woman!

I stood shocked at her presumption to challenge me. We exchanged unpleasantries and set to each other's throats there on dance-floor. Alas she was formidable, somewhat slimy, and armor plated. I admit distraction by the novel lizardy curves, and ended up quitting the dance floor and my hypno-plans. But, I say, she/he/it has not seen the last of me, Oh no! The day shall come when she flops in futility at the feet of the Hidden Paw! Bwuah-hah-hah! I need new boots! Bwuah-hah-haaaa

A Night or two in New Taloo

2008-06-26T23:30:00.000-07:00

The land is contracted for, and building will commence soon in the New Algeirs swamps, So I journeyed there again to make measurements for the basement crawdad-pit I plan to install. Soon, their palates will be trained for gomer gumbo- Bwuah-hahh-hah!..heh. But first, after some verbal sparring with Group-Action-Captain (or whatever) Zoe Connelly, I accepted a ride-along with Mr Henri as, I believe, he scouted possible bootlegging routes.

Jostling and jumping along, we sped through swamp and bayou, street and sidewalk, until we were both quite shaken and stirred. A notable engine in this car!

I've made contact with a soul sympathetic to the plight of Evil Kitty Genius here in one Miss LxxxXxx (name omitted for security purposes) who shall serve as a valuable contact in the goings-on about town and in New Toulouse proper. Hopefully, she can instruct me in the local Patois and culture here, that a kitty such as myself may blend in all the better!

Of Babbages and Kings

2008-06-26T23:18:00.000-07:00

Took an evening to explore the Babbage sims. Sooty and grim, though full of ingenious machinery!

I soon realize I couldn't swing a human without hitting 3 other mad scientists, it's so thick with them here. There's something to be said for being unique in one's trade: Overthrow would be difficult with so many competing evil agendas, each more diabolical and nefarious than the last!

I think I shall fulfill my position more easily in Caledon and New Toulouse, and leave this place to it's own devices, for now at least.

Welcome to the Neighborhood

2008-06-26T17:19:00.000-07:00

One night after cleaning the labs I noticed a small group nearby, and went off to investigate. Gathered in the darkness I spied the Metal-Man Hassenov, and the Noted busybodies Elladriene Laval and Air-Stewardess-Captain (or whatever) Zoe Connolly. They were plotting and planning some sort of propaganda, so I sat and watched for a bit. Eventually they summoned me closer, and I bade them a pleasant good evening, at which point they distracted me by displaying some photos for a magazine in production. Once I was unaware, they sprung their trap! They loosed a wild tiger at me!

Luckily, I speak some dialects of Tiger, so after warding off the beast with my Iron claws, and startling it with several cannon-shots, I was able to convince it to be subdued. I climbed to it's back and rode it, much to the amazement of the fiendish trio who had summoned the beast! But at their shouts, it threw me off again. Again they urged it to attack. Eventually, they bored if this sport, and called the vicious beast off.

Miss Laval reiterated that The Doctor was being watched, despite my protests that she was but a misunderstood genius and merchant. This shall not end here! They shall feel the discomfort of comeuppance, when on their knees before her they beg for mercy, bwuh-hah-hah!

Dirty Jobs: ETK Labs

2008-06-15T21:42:00.000-07:00

Evenings at the lab has become an enjoyable routine for me. For it, I often take a neko form so I can reach all the tall places that need dusting. My rounds begin with inspection for nefarious traps and devices left by one of the Doctor's many adversaries. I proceed to dispose of leftover corp... er, evidence of the day's activities. These are dragged to the nearby Moors, where another anonymous headstone will easily go unnoticed.

Next, synchronization of the Cavoritional engine the Dr. has constructed. Checking energy levels in the capacitors, and washing the window-tubes.

Then comes feeding the other occupant here, the Doctor's experiment in Bio-organic manipulation:Chuckles the Rat, or Mr. Squeaky, as I have come to call him. He enjoys long walks in the basement, but has learned the hard way not to nibble from the mistress' cheese.

Next a short break, gazing in adoration at the Mistress's portrait, sighing contentedly in awe of her magnificent genius.

Then, to keep myself in fighting shape, I don my fighting jammies and practice my katas!

After the work-out, it's back to the grind, sweeping the levels- we shed a lot, it seems!

Finally, a good scrubbing of my sleeping-area, removing any lingering spray. Nasty stuff!

"Wax on, Wax off...wax on, wax off..."

Prowling New Taloo

2008-06-15T18:05:00.000-07:00

I've heard much about the bustling Port town of New Toulouse, and have decided this would be an excellent place to expand the grasp of the Hidden Paw, should the Evil Doctor ever wish to do so. With this in mind I took a leisurely day casing the city.

Her citizens are gregarious and prone to indulgence, it seems. This is a good sign. Fertile fields to find new sub-minions, should they be required!

Sipping my brew, I sped through the winding streets, till I spied an advertisement for new property- an expansion into the nearby swamps of New Algeirs is planned. Ho-ho! Quickly I reserved a plot for a secret safehouse. Excellent.

Soon the cry will ring out- "Y'all bow down now, Y'heah?" Bwauh-hah-hahh-hahh!!!

June: Success!

2008-06-15T17:59:00.001-07:00

The interview went well, The Dr. has accepted me to the position. No bloodshed this first day, per her instructions. She is generous in giving me both a bounty of fine juicy caledonian mushroom-fed mouse-heads, and a dedicated scratching post/pell.

I am content with the duties assigned so far, and look forward to the apprenticeship!

May - Coming to Caledon

2008-06-15T01:59:00.000-07:00

May- Have arrived in Caledon after arduous journey. Have sent a "Special" resume along to the Doctor applying to the Minion position. Have a little free time before the appointment. I shall put it to good use, researching the mechanisms of state, and how they may best be thwarted! Bwuh-hah-hah-hah!!

The streets of the capital seem quiet- oddly empty of soldiers and guardsmen, beggars and thieves. I stop in a local shop...

Hmmm, I shall need a new set of clothes to blend in here...

Further along I see a large government hall, stealthily, I make my way in...and assume the seat of power!

I sit in state, sole ruler of Caledon! This was an absurdly easy coup! Long may I reign! I ready my edicts, and wait for the underlings and legislators to arrive...

Confound it! Where are they!!!??
I remain waiting in the empty hall for over an hour.
They are wily, indeed.

Giving up on this I continue exploring..ah-hah! the Governor's Palace! Perhaps I can "persuade" him into a granting of move/edit rights! ..bwu-hah-hah! I prepare my "Claws of Convincing"..

Empty again! But I find his plans for world domination brazenly displayed for all to see, The Hubris! How I admire it!

Soon, sir, ...Soon you shall feel the thorns in this Realm of Roses! Bwuh-haah-hhah-hahha!!!!

Still laughing softly (but maniacally) under my breath, I journey on to the Tiny Evil Kitten Labs, for my interview.

April

2008-06-14T20:08:00.000-07:00

April. Received instructions from the dispersed brotherhood to travel to Caledon, there to carry on the struggle against the imperialist forces that have brought us ruin. My mission: To apprentice to the known genius and Evil Tiny Kitty Dr. Malegatto Alter, aiding her in anyway possible to wake the Caledonian nation from it's long nightmare of peace and sobriety, and embrace her leadership as it should.

I say goodbye to the serene mountains of my homelands, it's citizenry once orderly, now tea-huckstering and appeasing to the Caledonian swarms that seek to invest and infest the countryside with their sickly waistcoated cheerfulness, and pollute our precious chat lists with their cheeky innuendo and un-ending event announcements... this is one event they shall not foresee! The revolution will not be advertised! Soon the sims of the Caled lands will tremble at the might of evil tiny kitty genius! Then shall the Doctor's dictates be obeyed; among them the ending of the "altering" of kitties, equal-access laws for Tinies, and mice upon demand for Evil tiny kitties! (I'm sure there's more, but these are the ones I'm excited about. She's smart. She knows what to do, I'm sure.)